The Promise Of Forgiveness
Posted on April 11, 2008 - Filed Under Arts and Entertainment
One of the most profound statements ever made regarding one’s self respect and dignity is over 2000 years old and yet it is just as applicable to our human nature today as it was then. “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you”. Someone is always reminding us of this principle, even in today’s world. For example, “Perform random acts of kindness”, or “Give until it hurts”, and, on a less global scale,” Johnny, stop picking on your sister”. Think for a moment, if you will what positive outcomes this age old adage would have on our world if we would all just adhere to its principal. World hunger would be almost non-existent. There would be no such thing as “road rage”, orphanages, or homeless shelters. However, the problem remains. It is this human condition that makes it nearly impossible for Johnny to completely stop picking on his sister. Although, if Johnny could be honest with himself about who he is, accepting his own shortcomings, then perhaps he would not pick on her as much.
I have come to believe that one of the deepest desires in every human beings life is to find a genuine sense of positive worth. To find acceptance in this imperfect world takes courage to first accept ourselves, with all of our own faults and imperfections.
For some, this process is second nature. They seem to know what they were born to do in this world, summon the attitude to overcome all signs of negativity and just do it. They love their job and their family. Poised and positive, these people take life by the horns and ride it with all of the grace and balance of a ballerina in mid- pirouette.
Yet for most of us, obtaining a sense of well-being can be a life long challenge.
There is a proverb from the Bible that describes this challenge well. “There is a way unto every man that seemeth right, but the end thereof is destruction.” If we are honest with ourselves, most of us can relate to the challenge in life of wanting to make the right decision, yet we end up rationalizing away any unwholesome consequences. Before long we find ourselves in a quandary. Almost simultaneously, our own humanity does not allow us to be perfect while our pride does not allow us to be imperfect. When the realization that we messed up again hits us, it is usually accompanied by feelings of guilt, shame and, often times, self disgust. The human emotion is frail; the pain is too much to bear so we push it under the carpet. However, our emotions never stay hidden for very long. Before long we start to see some lumps beneath the surface. These lumps begin to define our character. We start to see ourselves as victims or prisoners, caught in the chaos of an unfair life. Worst of all we surrender to the role of victim or prisoner without much of a fight.
In my children’s book, The Magic in You, the story of a flower that has taken root by a roadway at the edge of a beautiful forest begins to unfold. She is small in comparison to the other flowers and is teased for her insignificant stature. A Billy goat comes along and eats one of her pretty golden petals. Then a car drives by and runs over one of her leaves, leaving the flower in quite a forlorn state.
Sometimes people come into our lives with every intention of “running us over”, just like the rude car. They drain us emotionally as well as spiritually and some times even financially. When they are through, they leave us broken and distraught. How can we ever heal from such a painfully disastrous experience, especially when the perpetrators are long gone and there is no one left to confront?
People also come into our lives that make selfish decisions, like Mr. Billy goat. They give no thought to the consequences that their actions may have on the people around them. As a result the victim is left feeling used, as if a part of their dignity has been violated. Unless the abuser is truly sorry, then reconciliation may still not be possible. At this point, if we are not anchored in our worth, a variety of thoughts and emotions can wreak havoc within us. We may even wonder if the incident was actually our own fault, leading us to deeper despair. At times self protective behavior may start to surface and, like a wounded animal we may lash out at others in an attempt to protect our wounds.
In the little flower’s despair she begins to cry, which gains the attention of a nearby woodland fairy.
“‘Why are you crying little flower?’
‘Well,’ began the little flower, ‘I just don’t know why I am growing here, by the side of the road, I mean. All the other flowers make fun of me. I wasn’t feeling very pretty, and I wasn’t feeling very smart….’
‘Maybe.’ the little flower continued, ‘you could wave your magic wand and make me beautiful. Then I would surely be happy.’
‘Oh, no,’ replied the fairy as she gracefully poised herself to fly away. ‘You do not need my magic to become beautiful, or happy. You can become a happy, beautiful little flower any time you want.’”
With these thoughtful words planted in the little flower, fortuitous events begin to unfold, and the little flower quickly learns that though her circumstances may be less than ideal, she has the power to affect the lives of other living creatures by what she can give—kindness, love, and most of all, forgiveness.
The answer to the despair that lingers from the pain of having been the victim will always be forgiveness. We first need to let go of our self protective habits by forgiving ourselves for things we may have done to others. Only after acquiring grace for ourselves can we find the grace to forgive others. We can not give something away that we do not own. Forgiveness will always be more for ourselves than for those who have hurt us.
This is the timeless message of this poignantly illustrated story that transcends a reader’s age. One reason why the story touches on such a deep level is surely due to some of my own life struggle for self-acceptance after years of spousal abuse.
We all have a choice; to remain the victim or find the courage to accept ourselves with all our faults and all the wounds we have received from others. It wasn’t until I understood how much my Creator loved me and accepted me, with all of my faults, that I was able to find the same grace for myself and for others. My children’s story demonstrates the struggle to live a victorious life. The magic discovered by this delicate little flower is not only her story, but my story, too. Perhaps it is yours as well!
Book Statistics
Title: The Magic In You
ISBN(s): 1432703243
Retail Price(s): U.S. $24.95; CAN $30.95
Size and Format(s): 8.5 x 8.5 Color Paperback
Page count: 40
Availability: Ingram, Baker & Taylor, R.R. Bowker, LLC, Amazon.com, barnesandnoble.com,
http://www.outskirtspress.com/aheartofchivalry
Through Sally H Taylor’s own trials and triumphs she has come to believe in the power of faith, love and forgiveness as key objectives in her personal pursuit of happiness. Life’s experiences have taught her valuable lessons which she has come to identify as deep-rooted convictions. She feels certain that these convictions are necessary in the pursuit of peace with one’s self. Using a colorful blend of experience, talent, and imagination she dedicates she convictions to the future generations in a series of children’s books of which she is both author and illustrator. “The Magic In You” is the first.
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